Maybe your particular upcoming critical conversation doesn’t involve a rude conversation counterpart like the one in the story I tell in this blog post. But regardless, it’s got your attention and you’re probably feeling anxiety-ridden about it. It’s got you in its grip, am I right?

So when you know that you have an upcoming challenging conversation that may lead to conflict, disappointment, and/or disagreement (initially), how do you manage your own emotions effectively to stay productive and not get caught up in the emotional reaction swirl of fight, flight, or freeze?

The key to not reacting emotionally in critical conversations is to learn to regulate our emotions. Here are three tricks from research to help us regulate our emotions during critical conversations: